내 한국 결혼식 (My Korean Wedding)

This is the story of my Korean wedding. I blogged a long time ago about Korean weddings (before I actually got to be the bride in one) See here. Needless to say, my experience was a bit different, so I thought I'd put it down here, what it was like for this one particular 외국인 marrying a Korean in Korea.

Well it all began on a sunny day in October. Boyfriend (I guess I should call him Husband now) and I were eating burgers and enjoying a lovely Sunday. We were talking about our plans for the new year when we would both quit our jobs and travel the world together. Suddenly, he asked, "Don't you think it would be better if we were married?" To which I responded, "Did you just propose to me?" And he replied, "Well, that's not really how I wanted to propose, but do you want to get married?"

Fast forward two months (short engagement!). After a meeting with his parents, photo-shoot, invitations, blah blah blah, it was finally our wedding day. I expected a low stress experience, since the few Korean weddings I had attended before were pretty short and to-the-point: listen to a twenty minute speech, a friend sings a song, FREE BUFFET! My wedding was a little bit different. I'll save you the minute-by-minute details and stick to the things which I found interesting/different/awesome/frustrating about getting married in Korea.

EXPECTATIONS
I'm not really a fancy kind of gal. I'll admit that my sense of style is crippled at best, but I do enjoy things that are pretty in an understated and classic kind of way. What I found when I was preparing for my wedding day, and on the actual day, is that I was expected to look and act as much like a princess as possible. My wedding planner insisted that I try huge jewelry, tiaras, gloves, etc even when I insisted that I wanted a simple and elegant look. Maybe this happens to brides in every country... I don't know, but I'm happy that I stood up for my pearl studs and french manicure over a tiara and gloves. That is a bride's choice to make. I'm not saying gals shouldn't princess it up if they want to. I just think no one should be pressured into a style that they don't like/aren't comfortable with.

If this woman tries to make me wear a tiara one more time...

대기실
The 대기실 is the room where the bride waits before the wedding ceremony begins. Rather than hiding and then making a huge entrance, the bride sits in her little bride room and takes pictures with friends and family as they arrive before the ceremony. I actually really liked this part. It was nice to meet family and friends before the wedding. It calms the nerves and adds a bit a fun. Being a foreigner, it was also kind of like being a really exotic animal on exhibition. Lots of Boyfriend's friends and family were very shy about speaking English, so they'd poke their heads into the 대기실, smile broadly and wave. It was pretty cute.

My brother and I in the 대기실

VOWS
Because Boyfriend is a culturally sensitive and romantic kind of guy, he suggested that he read his vows in English and I read mine in Korean. This was one of the most stressful but rewarding experiences.

Desperate practicing of the vows

폐백
After we finished our western style wedding ceremony, we changed into 한복 and had a short Korean ceremony called 폐백. This is not a full traditional Korean wedding ceremony, but it's a chance for friends and relatives to say something to the bride and groom (best wishes or advice, etc). There's a lot of bowing and soju. The highlights were: Boyfriend's parents threw chestnuts and figs into a sash in my lap to determine how many kids we'll have (2 daughters, 1 son), Boyfriend and I fought over the seed in a fig to determine who will hold the power in our relationship (me!), and at the end I got a sweet piggy-back ride!

Fighting over the fig seed (not actually making out)

After our ceremony we walked the beaches of Busan and then sang the night away with all of our friends at a private 노래방. Safe to say, it was pretty much the best day ever.

Oh yea, and here are some of the highlights on video!

Anyone else get married in another country/cultural tradition? I'd love to hear about it!

Ashu